So blogging hasn't been at the top of the list lately. My head has been swirling, and shit hittin' the fan. If you keep up with the blog, you'll remember how I was "TAKING THE HOUSE BACK". Well, it's been done!
I now have a zero tolerance policy in the house. Counting to three and making myself sound like an idiot - OVER! The kids are old enough to get it. It's been amazing, but we had one "hiccup".
Lyla decided that she was tired of getting into trouble, and it was time for someone else to. On Thursday, she went into school and met with the social worker. This is usually a fun occassion for her. They chat, play games, sometimes read books, etc. She goes once a week to address her dyslexia and help her understand that she's different. She began telling the social worker that she's being abused at home by her brother, Jake. Lyla went so far as to say that she has bruises from him, and that she's scared to tell mom.
I'm at home, working away, when the phone rings. It's the social worker telling me what Lyla has said. Of course, my immediate reaction was to laugh. Nope, I had to go into school. If there were bruises, they said they'd have to take action! Me, being the hard-ass, told her that I'd be in during Lyla's outdoor recess. I knew this was a lie, and there was no way she was going to get play-time!
I march my ass into school, act patient in the social workers office. Really, I wanted to grab her by her ear and tell her that I can show her what bruises really are! As soon as Lyla realized that I was pulling down her pants to show them that there were no bruises she began to hysterically cry and yetll, "Don't tell Jake". Of course, because IT'S A LIE!! Each story she told us began with Lyla actually hitting her brother and her brother pulling or pushing her. Glad the social worker did her homework....NOT!
Yes, Mommy was quite pissed off. What made me more mad, was the fact that the social worker would not call her on it. Lyla was told that it was good for her to tell an adult. I CALL BULLSHIT!! The social worker said that it was punishment enough that she had to have her pants pulled down and I shouldn't address it further at home. NO FUCKING WAY! She was grounded, had to apologize to Jake and her fun classes were taken away.
Kids are getting too much control in these situations. Yes, if you're being abuse, it's good to tell an adult. If they adult realizes it's a lie, action needs to take place. What has this world come to when I need to defend one child against the other and the social workers won't call them out on this??? Our reputation would have been torn apart, our innocent child would have gone through hell. As my sister said, "This isn't he broke my pencil sort of shit."
The kids have been gems since then. I think they're getting the hang of it now! Thanks God!!
Doesn't sound like an effective social worker saying that embarrassment in the office was enough (I wonder if s/he has much experience). The punishment should fit the severity of the crime, and this one is no joke.
Posted by: Tinyjinny | 01/18/2011 at 01:22 PM
My heart goes out to your kids...do you even realize that everything you write stays immortalize by "mommy" forever...What do you say someday when she comes home from school or from a job interview and they mention or more likely not even mention but hold it against her because of her mommy wanted to tell the world about her so called disability...
I'm not a follower of this blog, I just happen to see it when I was surfing about the NHL so no need to respond. I won't see it...
Jon
Posted by: Jon Peterson | 01/18/2011 at 06:07 PM
Dear Jon,
You have posted the most ignorant comment I have seen so far. It is people like you that hold it against people with a disability. I hope no one in your family is dealing with any type of supposed diability because you probably have them hiding it in shame.
By the way, education has come a long way and people actually overcome things and function in the world. Take a look someday while you're surfing the internet and see how many successful people have some type of disability.
A little FYI: I'm assuming the school district is already aware of the dyslexia so she probably won't come home from school someday upset because someone holds it against her. As for a job, people with dyslexia work and succeed. I take it you don't work because you were surfing the internet at 4 in the afternoon.
Posted by: Kimblasiak | 01/19/2011 at 08:26 AM
And considering that President George W. Bush had dyslexia; yup, sure can do things with a disability!
Posted by: Tinyjinny | 01/19/2011 at 10:05 PM
I am so glad you are teaching your children that there are consequences, and they need to do the right thing. As a babysitter, nanny, and education major I spend my most of my time around children. It amazes me how many parents, teachers, and other adults allow their children to swear at them and talk back at 7 years old. I can't believe the school told you not to give any further punishment at home. You definitely did the right thing, stay strong it sounds like you are doing a great job!
Posted by: Pinky | 01/21/2011 at 09:19 PM
Thank you so much for talking about your kids, and what life is like for you. I need to ask a favor and it's only because you are so open about your daughter's dyslexia that I ask, and it's only because I have a feeling that my daughter may be dyslexic or has some visual issue going on that I ask, would you maybe be able to email me with how you figured out your daughter was dyslexic? I know it's alot of me to ask, but I'm just searching for an answer. My email is annielion_2000@yahoo.com. I thank you so much in advance.
Posted by: Annielion 2000 | 03/06/2011 at 06:37 PM